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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22976506">The Tag Wrangler’s Vendetta</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/alexwlchan/pseuds/alexwlchan'>alexwlchan</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>AO3 Tags</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Enemies to Siblings to Lovers</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 15:47:35</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>761</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22976506</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/alexwlchan/pseuds/alexwlchan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>One woman’s mission to get a new tag. One tag wrangler’s mission to stop her.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>17</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Tag Wrangler’s Vendetta</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/bessyboo/gifts">bessyboo</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Yes, I am back posting total nonsense. This time it’s <a href="https://twitter.com/bessyboo/status/1234191737859514370">bessyboo’s fault</a>:</p><blockquote>
  <p>If people weren’t COWARDS, someone besides me and AO3 user slugmutt would use the tag “Enemies to Siblings to Lovers” (but lol OFC both works with this tag are Star Wars) <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Enemies%20to%20Siblings%20to%20Lovers">https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Enemies%20to%20Siblings%20to%20Lovers</a></p>
</blockquote>Then this happened.
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <strong>INT. – A SUSPICIOUSLY HIPSTER LAW FIRM.</strong>
</p><p>The smell of vegan bacon fills the air. BESSYBOO is typing furiously on her phone.</p><p>BESSYBOO<br/>
Why does nobody else use the “enemies to siblings to lovers” tag on AO3, this is the WOOORST.</p><p>
  <strong>INT. – THE UNDERGROUND VOLCANO LAIR OF THE AO3 MODS, DAY</strong>
</p><p>On a console with an implausibly large number of buttons and switches, a light flashes red.</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1<br/>
Ugh, is bessyboo trying to make that tag happen <em>again</em>? She knows I’m always going to reject it, stop encouraging people.</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1 pushes a button labelled “REJECT THAT TAG”. The label is a slightly worn post-it note written in sharpie, and the words “THAT TAG” have been underlined several times.</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #2<br/>
What is it with you and that tag?</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1<br/>
I don’t like it, okay???</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #2<br/>
If you say so.</p><p>It’s just… don’t you think it’s a bit weird you wired up a special light on the console just so you could find out when she’s using that tag. Isn’t that a bit excessive?</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1<br/>
(snapping) It’s perfectly normal.</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #2<br/>
But that’s the console where we get the big emergency warnings! Shipping wars … the kudos fountain drying up … running out of red fuzzy felt for the header … and you’re using it for a personal vendetta?</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1<br/>
(Through gritted teeth) Perfectly. Normal.</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #2<br/>
(rolling eyes) If you say so.</p><p>
  <strong>INT. – THE UNDERGROUND VOLCANO LAIR OF THE AO3 MODS, NIGHT</strong>
</p><p>A different light flashes red.</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1, stirring sleepily<br/>
Somebody in another timezone read that tweet? You won't get me that easily!</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1 pushes the button labelled “REJECT THAT TAG”.</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #3, quizzically<br/>
What are you doing?</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1<br/>
It’s … it’s nothing.</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #3<br/>
I know I’m new here, but come on, that was definitely something. That’s the panel of Important Buttons. I was told not to touch that unless it was an emergency!</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1<br/>
It’s just … this thing … there’s a woman who really wants to make this tag be a thing, and I hate this tag and so I make sure she doesn’t use it. Perfectly normal.</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #3<br/>
Uh huh.</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1<br/>
(fuming) STOP. ASKING. ABOUT IT.</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #3<br/>
I didn't say anything!</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1<br/>
(dagger eyes)</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #3<br/>
(looks down)</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1<br/>
STOP THINKING IT.</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #3<br/>
Come on, you don't think it's a little bit weird?</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1<br/>
It's … ugh, alright. I just want her to notice me, y'know? (wistful tone) I think we'd be really good friends.</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #3<br/>
Does she even know you're blocking this tag? Or is it just a one-sided, anonymous vendetta?</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1<br/>
(grumpily) No, she doesn't. But how else am I going to get her to notice me?</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #3<br/>
Well how about reaching out to her, saying something nice to her? That's a good way to get to know somebody. [walks to back of room, rifles through a filing cabinet, pulls out a manilla folder] It says here she likes … pod–fic? I don't think I know that term, is it fic about pod people?</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1<br/>
It's fiction, but read aloud, sort of like podcasts? [TAG WRANGLER #3 stares back blankly.] Oh, right, I forgot, we burn out that bit of knowledge in all the new hires. Podfic is forbidden knowledge. But yeah, that's a good idea, yeah, I'll record her something.</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #3<br/>
Ree-kord? [looks as if they're remembering something they heard of, once, long ago]</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1<br/>
Yeah! It's pretty quiet right now, let's go down to the recording studio.</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #3<br/>
We have a recording studio???</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1<br/>
Yeah, but it's not on the tour or the maps, it doesn't get much use. Come on, let's go!</p><p>
  <strong>INT. – A PODCAST RECORDING STUDIO</strong>
</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1 is sitting in front of a microphone. TAG WRANGLER #3 is sitting behind a recording desk.</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #3<br/>
Wow, look at all these buttons! What are you going to say?</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1<br/>
I don’t know, give me a moment to think! And keep your voice down, we’re not supposed to be in here.</p><p>TAG WRANGLER #1 looks down at the microphone.</p><p>
  <strong>INT. – HALLWAY OUTSIDE THE PODCAST RECORDING STUDIO</strong>
</p><p>A light above the door labelled “RECORDING IN PROGRESS” blinks on. A silhouette of a tall, dark figure appears in the end of the hallway, and looks towards the door.</p><p>
  <strong>END OF ACT ONE</strong>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I’m sure you have questions. I do as well. Questions like:</p><ul>
<li>What does day and night even mean in the context of a volcano lair?</li>
<li>Will bessyboo and the tag wrangler fall for each other?</li>
<li>What else is on the panel of Important Buttons?</li>
<li>Who is the mysterious dark figure?</li>
<li>And most importantly of all… <em>what sort of microphone are they using</em>?
</li>
</ul><p>(I wouldn’t expect answers to any of this questions; this is very much a one-shot.)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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